Disclaimer: as you read this, be aware that I have already taken my double dose of melatonin.
Earlier this week, my mom called me. She calls me on the daily, but the particular conversation I am going to reference happened earlier this week. It was Sunday, so we each delivered a download on our respective weekends.
I had a great weekend: equal amounts productive as it was fun, and I told her that I had forgotten what it felt like to actually enjoy a girls’ night (thanks a million, Kaylee). I could hear the emotion before she even spoke the next sentence. “I am so proud of you.”
Compliments from my parents never seemed to mean much. Hello, they created me. I am literal fragments of them. Of course they should like me. Alas, this was a different circumstance.
She went on to describe why she was so proud of me: my strength and positivity through particularly trying times. I am not emotional whatsoever (LOL) so of course I was perfectly composed as she is going on about recent situations regarding some unattractive qualities. Just kidding, I was a wreck.
Sure, I’m alright. But that is not because of efforts of my own. I have an ARMY of great people, women, behind me. Old friends, new friends, coworkers, sisters, brothers, cousins, even the women in bar bathrooms I had never seen previously. Everyone had been so sincere, supportive, and leant an ear whenever I wanted to rehash or reevaluate an event for the umpteenth time.
And GOD BLESS all those people who saw me cry and kept a straight face. For Christ’s sake, it is not cute. Not even remotely. People should immediately not feel bad for me because of the discomfort I bring to their eyeballs .
Anyway, it’s not a coincidence I am writing this on International Women’s Day. I am so grateful for all those incredible females in my life (and the men). But specifically my female family members who showed me what strength is and what it isn’t. Strength doesn’t only exist in the absence of emotion, but knowing how to take that emotion and channel it into something SO GREAT.
I cannot formulate another sentence that is remotely literate. Carry on with your Friday night.